Chapter 4 - WHAT THE CAMERA RECORDED
At 2:12 a.m., I sat on the edge of a guest bed wearing borrowed pajamas while Mara photographed the bruises on my back.
She never asked me to explain more than necessary.
Left shoulder.
Upper arm.
Ribs.
Thigh.
Wrist.
Each photograph felt like a confession.
When we finished, she put the phone down.
“You should be examined.”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not.”
I almost laughed.
“Everyone keeps saying that tonight.”
“Maybe everyone finally noticed.”
That hurt more than I expected.
I stared at the carpet.
“Andrew is careful.”
Mara waited.
“He doesn’t hit my face before events.”
My voice sounded detached.
“He knows where clothing covers.”
“When did it start?”
I hesitated.
“Last December.”
“What happened?”
“We went to dinner after a hospital benefit.”
I stared at my hands.
“A man from the board hugged me goodbye.”
“Andrew accused me of flirting.”
“When we got home, he grabbed my arm.”
I swallowed.
“The next morning he cried.”
“He brought flowers.”
“He said he’d been exhausted.”
“He said his father used to hit his mother and he was terrified he was becoming him.”
Mara’s expression remained neutral.
“Then what?”
“I believed him.”
Two weeks later, it happened again.
Then again.
Each apology became shorter.
Each accusation became stranger.
My dress was too fitted.
My coworker had called too late.
I had laughed too warmly at dinner.
I had forgotten to answer one text.
I had spent twenty minutes longer than expected buying groceries.
Then Andrew began controlling money.
My location.
My passwords.
My schedule.
He called it planning our future.
I called it love because the alternative terrified me.
Mara leaned forward.
“Did he ever threaten to kill you?”
I looked up.
“Yes.”
The word barely came out.
“What exactly did he say?”
I closed my eyes.
“If you ever ruin me, I’ll make sure nobody finds enough of you to bury.”
Mara did not react visibly.
She only asked, “When?”
“Three weeks ago.”
“Any witnesses?”
“No.”
“Recording?”
“No.”
My eyes opened.
Then I remembered.
“Maybe.”
Mara leaned closer.
“What?”
“The apartment has an automated home security system.”
“So?”
“Andrew installed cameras after someone broke into the building garage.”
“Inside the apartment?”
“Only the hallway and living room.”
“Cloud backup?”
I nodded slowly.
“I think so.”
“Do you have access?”
“Andrew changed the administrator password.”
Mara stood.
“We may not need it.”
I frowned.
“If the system sends data to a third-party company, a lawyer may be able to preserve it.”
My heart started pounding.
“Before he deletes it?”
“Potentially.”
She grabbed her phone.
“I know someone.”
Twenty minutes later, Ethan arrived outside the guest unit.
He did not enter until I said yes.
He had removed his tuxedo jacket and loosened his tie.
He looked exhausted.
“I found the cufflinks.”
I stared at him.
“What?”
He held up a small velvet box.
“They were in my office the entire time.”
I laughed.
I did not mean to.
It simply escaped.
The absurdity of it cracked something inside me.
Ethan smiled faintly.
“I thought you might appreciate the stupidity of the universe.”
I covered my face.
Then I started crying.
Not dramatically.
Not loudly.
I just could not stop.
Ethan remained across the room.
He did not reach for me.
That mattered.
Eventually I lowered my hands.
“Mara thinks there may be recordings.”
Ethan’s expression changed.
“Of Andrew?”
“Possibly.”
“Then we preserve them.”
“I don’t know whether I can do this.”
“You don’t have to decide tonight.”
“Mara said the same thing.”
“She’s usually smarter than I am.”
I looked at him.
“Why are you doing this?”
His answer came too quickly.
“Because you’re my employee.”
“No.”
I shook my head.
“Don’t insult me.”
Ethan exhaled.
He walked to the window.
For months, I had wondered whether I imagined the way he looked at me.
The blue scarf folded over his chair.
The extra coffee already waiting when I arrived early.
The way he remembered my mother’s birthday because I had mentioned it once.
The silence when I announced my engagement.
Now, with everything broken open between us, he finally stopped pretending.
“I’ve been in love with you since November.”
The room went still.
He turned.
“And I hated myself for it because you were with someone else.”
My throat tightened.
“I never intended to tell you.”
“Then why tell me now?”
“Because you asked why this hurts me.”
His voice was rawer than I had ever heard it.
“And because I don’t want you spending one second wondering whether I’m helping you because I expect something.”
He came no closer.
“You owe me nothing.”
“Not a relationship.”
“Not affection.”
“Not gratitude.”
“Nothing.”
I looked down.
“I loved you too.”
Ethan stopped breathing for a moment.
I continued before courage disappeared.
“I think that’s why Andrew became worse.”
“What?”
“He noticed.”
“Did you tell him?”
“No.”
“He asked why I smiled at work more than I smiled at home.”
Ethan closed his eyes.
Pain crossed his face.
I shook my head.
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Blame yourself.”
He looked at me.
“He would’ve found another reason.”
For the first time, I understood how true that was.
The phone in Mara’s hand suddenly rang.
She answered.
Listened.
Then looked at us.
“The security company found the account.”
My pulse stopped.
May you like
Mara continued.
“They have ninety days of cloud footage.”
